desert dweller
Trail Wise!
Power to the Peaceful...Hate does not create.
Posts: 6,290 
|
Post by desert dweller on Nov 7, 2017 12:57:09 GMT -8
Q. What do you get when you cross a redneck and a hippie?
A. A hickie.
|
|
|
|
Post by hikerjer on Nov 7, 2017 13:22:08 GMT -8
[tr][td class="content"][article] What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage
along with... "a recipe".
Well, I liked that one, at least. |
|
rebeccad
Trail Wise!
Writing like a maniac
Posts: 12,376 
|
Post by rebeccad on Nov 7, 2017 16:58:38 GMT -8
Keep 'em clean, gang, and let's not get into the ethnic slurs.
|
|
rebeccad
Trail Wise!
Writing like a maniac
Posts: 12,376
|
Post by rebeccad on Nov 7, 2017 16:58:55 GMT -8
Why won't sharks eat lawyers?
Professional courtesy.
|
|
echo
Trail Wise!
Posts: 3,198
|
Post by echo on Nov 7, 2017 17:31:25 GMT -8
What is the only room a ghost can’t go into?
The Living Room
|
|
|
|
Post by cuzimthedad on Nov 7, 2017 18:03:45 GMT -8
Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road?
So she could lay it on the line.
Why did the turtle cross the road?
So it could go to the Shell station.
|
|
tomas
Trail Wise!
Posts: 1,906
|
Post by tomas on Nov 7, 2017 18:08:12 GMT -8
Did you hear that the famous comedian, Joseph King, committed suicide? Turns out he got sick of everybody always telling him, "You must be joking."
|
|
geosp
Trail Wise!
Posts: 492
|
Post by geosp on Nov 7, 2017 18:24:22 GMT -8
Why are pirates pirates?
...because they arrr
|
|
ErnieW
Trail Wise!
I want to backpack
Posts: 9,219
|
Post by ErnieW on Nov 7, 2017 18:34:32 GMT -8
Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
He was feeling a little crummy.
|
|
|
|
Post by hikerjer on Nov 7, 2017 18:56:32 GMT -8
So, two strangers are drinking beer together in a bar on the 23rd floor of a posh hotel in New York City. First guy ask the other guy, "What are you drinking tonight?" Second guy looks at him and replies, "Oh, this is magic beer". First guy scoffs and says "Come on, there's no such thing as magic beer." First guy says, "No, no. This really is magic beer. I'll show you" and he takes another drink, walks to the 23rd floor window, opens it and leaps out and proceeds to swoop up and down and fly around the building and then return to his bar stool. First guy excitedly says, "Wow, that really is magic beer. Mind if I have some?" "Not at all says the first guy. So the one time skeptic takes the glass and has a large gulp of the magic beer. He then proceeds to the open window, jumps out and immediately plummets 23 floors to his death. The bartender looks at the first guy and says, "Ya know, Superman, you're a real jerk when you're drunk".
|
|
|
|
Post by ecocentric on Nov 7, 2017 19:43:05 GMT -8
I thought I might need the advice of an attorney, so I made an appointment to talk with one. I asked, "So how do you charge for your services?"
"For consultations, I charge $500 for you to ask three questions," he replied.
Shocked, I said, "Wow! Don't you think that's pretty steep?"
"Yes, and your third question..."
|
|
|
|
Post by hikingtiger on Nov 8, 2017 8:05:37 GMT -8
let's not get into the ethnic slurs. Wow. One valley girl joke and we get a reprimand. (kidding) |
|
desert dweller
Trail Wise!
Power to the Peaceful...Hate does not create.
Posts: 6,290
|
Post by desert dweller on Nov 8, 2017 8:12:09 GMT -8
One valley girl joke and we get a reprimand. (kidding) I bet she was referring to the redneck/hippie joke. |
|
geosp
Trail Wise!
Posts: 492
|
Post by geosp on Nov 8, 2017 12:58:00 GMT -8
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog on a lead.
He picks the dog up and starts swinging it around his head.
Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out, 'Can I help you sir!'
'No thanks' says the blind bloke, 'Just looking'.
|
|
desert dweller
Trail Wise!
Power to the Peaceful...Hate does not create.
Posts: 6,290
|
Post by desert dweller on Nov 8, 2017 13:16:19 GMT -8
A blind man goes to the hardware store and buys all the material needed to build a tree house and had it delivered to his home. The delivery guys could tell he was blind and asked the owner's wife how he was going to build a tree house if he couldn't see. "That's no problem." she said as he took his hammer and saw.
|
|
Image Credit / Coolkat
