rebeccad
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Writing like a maniac
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Post by rebeccad on Mar 11, 2016 8:41:30 GMT -8
Tarol, you remind me that for 1.5 years I lived alone in a cabin in the woods (won't say where--wouldn't want to get anyone in trouble ), and in general, I very much enjoyed my retreat. I was in grad school at the time, and didn't even go to town every day, but was seldom lonely. I did more music then than I have any time since college, too. But still--the best was when my now-husband started coming to visit from time to time
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Post by Lamebeaver on Mar 11, 2016 9:34:03 GMT -8
In the "real world" we tend to get wrapped up in our own problems. We anguish over squabbles with friends, family and coworkers. We worry about paying bills, doing the right things. We're concerned about the opinions others have about us.
When I'm alone in the wilderness, miles away from another human, I become acutely aware of what an insignificant speck I am in the universe.
This helps put things into perspective. Because of my insignificance, all of my troubles simply melt away and vanish.
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amaruq
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Call me Little Spoon
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Post by amaruq on Mar 11, 2016 9:37:09 GMT -8
And it's not just about getting the hang of the routine. The zen goes much deeper than that. And here I would have though it would be about completely abandoning the need for routine.
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rebeccad
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Writing like a maniac
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Post by rebeccad on Mar 11, 2016 15:42:05 GMT -8
And here I would have though it would be about completely abandoning the need for routine. The trail certainly has a rhythm and a routine. Travel does too, even if the routine is what you yourself do to make yourself comfortable in each new place, with all the other routines shot to pieces. Reading before bed is a routine that has followed me pretty much everywhere I've ever gone.
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johnnyray
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Argle-Bargle, Jiggery-Pokery, and Applesauce
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Post by johnnyray on Mar 11, 2016 16:27:35 GMT -8
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Post by hikerjer on Mar 11, 2016 17:24:10 GMT -8
Interesting question. The vast majority of my traveling and hiking has been solo, usually by choice. I don't dislike traveling with companions because I do like it on occasion, provided, of course, they are the right ones. Still, I prefer solo simply for the somewhat selfish reason, I suppose, that I only have to please myself. However, as I age, there are occasions when I wish I had company. They are usually in the evening just before dark when it would be nice to have someone to talk over the day's events and tomorrow's possibilities. Also, when I come across something particularly beautiful or wonderful, it would often be nice to share it with someone. However, most of the time, I'm just fine by myself. I'm planning on a cross country bicycle trip of 3-4 months duration this summer by myself. I've never considered doing it any other way. When I tell people that, the usual response is,"by yourself?" That's crazy." I simply respond, "I find myself good company and others often don't." Besides, I know I'll come across plenty of people to hang with on the trip if I so wish and often I do. Like has been said, it's not good to be lonely, but it can be good to be alone. I suppose in the end, it all depends on our personality.
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crawford
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Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.--Edison
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Post by crawford on Mar 11, 2016 18:04:06 GMT -8
Do not forget that we are pack animals. We are built to be with groups, designed for communication and contact. We can find aloneness a good thing. Solitude for a time can be of great value for many people. For others, the natural response is to become lonely in a short period of time.
I disagree with any notion that someone is more spiritual or intellectual if they can be alone for longer. I also reject that it is simply a lust thing, we are far more complicated than that. I can be alone for a time, I've been alone for a long time in the past, I did become a bit lonely at time but I didn't slip into deep loneliness. Not sure why, perhaps I had some additional satisfaction in my life, perhaps hope in future contact.
I think you're normal. The rest of us....the jury is still out on.
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Westy
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Post by Westy on Mar 11, 2016 18:07:00 GMT -8
The vast majority of my traveling and hiking has been solo, usually by choice. I don't dislike traveling with companions because I do like it on occasion, provided, of course, they are the right ones. Mission Critical: The right ones. One of the worst experiences you can have is traveling with another person or members of your group that you dislike. I have witnessed many backcountry vacations from Hades because of personal disagreements. My current partners are my 18-year old daughter and a friend I have none since Junior High 50 years ago. The best practice is to develop and validate your partners, day hikes to overnighters to multi-day, to multi-week. The other factor is "sphere of influence" or comfort zone. Some people get really uptight when they are physically and geographically distant from their norm. Choose your partners well!
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Post by hikerjer on Mar 11, 2016 19:41:26 GMT -8
Choose your partners well! In all things.
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Post by skschrip on Mar 11, 2016 20:49:20 GMT -8
If someone is in a relationship "at home" with a significant other and then hits the woods for a weekend or a week or a month on a solo trip, that person just may not ever feel "real" loneliness, because he/she is never really alone. There's someone waiting back home for him. Real loneliness in the woods is a tough nut to crack. There's no one "back home" who gives a crap whether you're out or not and could care less. I think this ^ combined with this: Personally, I'd much rather deal with solitude than conforming to a group, but there have been times that you see something incredibly breathtaking, like the multiple hues of purple the mountains turn at twilight. Not too much to bear, but rather a shame not to share. Is kind of where it's at for me. Not necessarily because there's no one back "home" (geez, that word takes one a heavy meaning) who cares about me, but because there's no one back home who really cares about what I'm doing, or is very like-minded, I guess. I'm a hardcore introvert, so it's not that I feel lonely for company, it's just this... weird sense of emptiness when I experience something so amazing, and have to come back home to this dumb place where nobody really understands. Oof, that sounds real angst-y, but I'm still trying to put it into words, so forgive me. Again, it's not quite loneliness I feel. I feel quite content to be alone. It's just like there's something missing from this otherwise incredibly fulfilling thing that I'm experiencing.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 12, 2016 9:23:44 GMT -8
Do not forget that we are pack animals. We are built to be with groups, designed for communication and contact. We can find aloneness a good thing. Solitude for a time can be of great value for many people. For others, the natural response is to become lonely in a short period of time. ¶ I disagree with any notion that someone is more spiritual or intellectual if they can be alone for longer. I'm a hardcore introvert, so it's not that I feel lonely for company, it's just this... weird sense of emptiness when I experience something so amazing, and have to come back home to this dumb place where nobody really understands. There are many interesting ideas broached above. The word "introvert" appears many times in this thread. I was probably the first to use it. But I don't consider myself an introvert at all. In an average week I associate with hundreds of people at different levels, but I do always hike solo. When I was younger, I was on a vision quest of sorts. I thought that if I got deep enough into my own psych I could find wisdom. Whether true or not, what I did find was a frustration similar to what Sara (skschrip) expressed: a "weird sense of emptiness when I experience something so amazing, and have to come back home to this dumb place where nobody really understands." It was true when I was younger and it is true today. There are a lot of people who "just don't get it." Humans are indeed pack animals. But inevitably, the survival of pack animals as a species often depends upon lone dispersers as much as upon pack structure. Rare is the pack of wolves that does not spin off lone dispersers, who may travel hundreds of miles to mingle with dispersers of other packs. I have a decent respect for the opinions of humankind. I also have a decent knowledge of how those opinions trampled the ecosystems and indigenous peoples and species of the West. The history of our gregarious species is not encouraging. Yet popular movies and fiction dwell on themes of the suffering loners who become the heroes. To bolster our myths we resort to the mystic on the mountain top or the lone "Wise Old Indian Chief," into whose mouth we may place our own words. Expressed another way, a wise old Indian chief once said, "Don't believe everything you hear attributed to a wise old Indian chief." We are a society with a fascination for loners whom we have never bothered to listen to anyhow. It's remarkable that for all the Native American chiefs that Western settlement refused to listen to, we now claim to have such a wide collection of our own sayings conveniently put into the mouths of lonely Wise Old Indian Chiefs who never said them. To be great is to be misunderstood. Evidently society needs loners to misinterpret for its own purposes.
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Post by skschrip on Mar 12, 2016 10:16:12 GMT -8
^Dang dude. That's some insight to chew on. Love it.
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Post by Lonewolf on Mar 12, 2016 12:57:45 GMT -8
Who's "we"? I could use a few pack animals to haul my gear.... :( While most humans are social, much of human's territorial expansions have come from the lone wander and explorer who wandered far outside the home territory. Those who wanted to know what was across that vast apparently waterless plain or on the other side of that big mountain.
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rebeccad
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Post by rebeccad on Mar 12, 2016 14:29:31 GMT -8
While most humans are social, much of human's territorial expansions have come from the lone wander and explorer who wandered far outside the home territory. Those who wanted to know what was across that vast apparently waterless plain or on the other side of that big mountain. Yet none of that would have led to expansion if there weren't others who were willing to pick up the herd and move at least a portion of it into new territory. Not all alone, because it's hard to reproduce that way...
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johnnyray
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Post by johnnyray on Mar 12, 2016 15:25:33 GMT -8
Expansion maybe due to the quest for resources, humans over exploiting their food and water supply is nothing new.
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